This weekend I have been thinking about the first time I held Tyson and Gavin.
When we arrived at the hospital on the day Tyson was born, Mr. R rushed to Tyson’s birth mom’s side. She had had some complications and he wanted to make sure she was okay. He ran (literally) to her room.
I got to the doorway and stopped not wanting to upset Nicole or disrespect her in any way.
Within a couple minutes, Nicole’s mom asked me if I wanted to hold new little Tyson. My heart was screaming yes, but I heard myself say, “I’d love to if it is okay with Nicole.”
A couple minutes later she handed me little Tyson right there outside Nicole’s room.
I wept. Tears of joy and bliss streaked me cheeks. “This is what motherhood feels like,” I remember telling myself. Although I wanted to hold him forever, there was an entire family in that hospital room that was hurting and this was their time with Tyson.
Before we left for the evening, this picture was snapped.
The first time I held Gavin the world stopped turning. His dimple and wild black hair captured my heart. My husband took this picture of 100% pure motherhood exploding joy when I first looked at his face.
I love these of Mr. R loving his new baby …and I adore how tenderly he is moving the blanket away from Gavin’s face so you can see him in the family picture. Melts my heart to see daddies and their babies.
When I think of these bittersweet days surrounding the birth and placement of our kids, I am overwhelmed with the amount of love that each of their extended birth families have for them. My kids have an army of amazing, loving and supportive people praying for them, cheering for them and worrying about them.
I recently got a comment from a reader who was struggling with infertility. I could feel her heartache as she asked, “How do you continue your biological line through adoption?” I told her that you don’t, but you do get to celebrate a new line and a new biology and it is choice. Although each of my kids did not look like my husband and I when they were born, I recognized their spirits. They felt like home to me.
And that’s the miracle of adoption.
You can see that amazing moment in this video from a birth mom documenting her story. Let your heart sing at minute 1:25.