When my sister-in-law lost her baby, she said music was very healing for her.
Especially this song. I have linked to it before, but I have a deeper connection to it now.
It was a necklace (from my own shop) that my business partners had made for me for Brooke without me knowing. It had the words SWIM stamped on it in bold letters.
“I swim for brighter days despite the absence of sun, choking on salt water.”
In it was a note that touched my heart. You see, she found out her baby was a girl the same day that we found out that ours wouldn’t be coming home with us. She pointed out that it wasn’t fair and gave me permission to take a back seat in the celebration of their new little one if I needed to.
Although it wasn’t exactly how I felt, (I did deliver 5 boxes of beautiful little girl clothes to her and made her look at each adorable item/ruffle/skirt/pair of shoes with me), I appreciated that she gave me permission to take some space and take some time to heal my heart instead of being offended if I wasn’t all up in the celebration.
That’s the “beauty for ashes” that comes from going through suffocating heartache: Your heart enlarges.
Here’s hoping you are making the most of your beautiful heartbreak.
Thank you, Brookie. You inspire me.