What is motherhood?

 

Every Mother’s Day this thought goes through my head: What is motherhood?

Is it bearing children? Rearing children? Can you be childless and be considered a mother? And where do birth mothers come in? Surrogates? Women who have lost children? It can get tricky.

It’s the “obvious” answers to the above, those “definitions”, that lead to hurt feelings. I cringe every time I hear that motherhood is bearing children. It isn’t that to me. In fact, motherhood is the opposite of that for me.

This motherhood label isn’t as black and white as you may think (have children = mother), I think motherhood is more a list than it is tally count of little humans.

A list of attributes with “meaning after meaning after meaning.” This list should bind us together as women instead of pit us against each other in categories of mommy wars. Unify. Empower. Enrich.

 

Eve was given the identity of “the mother of all living”—years, decades, perhaps centuries before she ever bore a child. It would appear that her motherhood preceded her maternity, just as surely as the perfection of the Garden preceded the struggles of mortality. I believe mother is one of those very carefully chosen words, one of those rich words—with meaning after meaning after meaning. We must not, at all costs, let that word divide us. I believe with all my heart that it is first and foremost a statement about our nature, not a head count of our children.”

-Patricia Holland, One Thing Needful: Becoming Women of Greater Faith in Christ

 

Thus, I started a new project.

For the next few months, possibly longer, I am going to post a photograph of motherhood with accompanying attributes. Let’s explore together the “meaning after meaning after meaning” of motherhood.

Care to join me? Email me a photograph of what motherhood looks like to you and a sentence or two to go along with it. I will do the rest. And it will be beautiful.

 

Motherhood? What does it mean to you?

 

 

My husband plays semi-pro football.

He recently had a game a couple hours away in warm St. George, Southern Utah.

We took the opportunity for a family weekend away to the red rocks.

Mr. R is so lucky to have a wife that serenades him with classics like “Pump Up the Jam” while on said road trips. Listening to 80′s and 90′s classics (and all the stories we have to go along with them) is how we keep ourselves entertained. (XM Radio, y’all!)

 

 

I made road trip activity bags for the kids again. It included new movies for the van’s DVD player, snacks and coloring books. They hardly made a whiny peep the whole time. I swear, those goodie bags are the best idea I have ever had.

Baby Jack is the best little road tripper!

He loved to look out the window, talk to us, make faces at his brothers in the back seat and eat his toys. Jackson was born in the winter so being in the car with him now that it is starting to get hot makes me keep a special eye on him. I was grateful for the minivan’s sunshades that pull out of the door, giving him some shade, but still allowing me to roll the window down and get him some fresh air.

 

St. George is so pretty! We made some great memories.

Walking around the grounds at the St. George Temple–the oldest LDS temple in Utah, swimming at the hotel, watching this cute little girl (whom we didn’t know) come right up to my handsome Tyson and put her hands on his cheeks while at a Polynesian restaurant (Mr. R and I were in the minority as far as white folks were concerned–love it when that happens! Are there lots of adoptive families in St. George? It sure seemed like it!) …and OF COURSE cheering on our favorite football guy.

It’s important to me to support Mr. R in his football playing endeavors and it’s important to me that my kids see their parents doing things that we love to do. I want them to know that we are well-rounded people, involved in more than work, house-cleaning and homework helping.

For Mr. R, that means playing football. The boys love to go to his games, cheer on Dad, dance to the music during the time outs and play on the field with their dad after the game.

He is their hero.

I wouldn’t have missed this little moment for the world.

 

Full disclosure: I was compensated for this post by Ken Garff Honda of Orem.
Learn how you can save $500 on any vehicle purchase (new, used, lease) or 10% off service at Ken Garff Honda of Orem.

 

Happy Birth Mother’s Day!

To celebrate, I am partnering with Blessings In a Basket, a wonderful online community for birth moms. Blessings In a Basket believes there is a Big Tough Girl in each of us. Part of their incredible community includes a retreat. This year the retreat is actually A CRUISE! Say whaaaa?

 

Who is this cruise for?

The Big Tough Girl Cruise is open to all big tough girls including Birth Mothers AND Adoptive Mothers AND Adoptive Mama Hopefuls.

This amazing retreat will include an art workshop on the serenity deck at sunset, open birthmom/adoptive mom panels where we will open the lines of communication-learn and heal from each other, private group sessions, so many free goodies for each of you, on-shore excursions and so much more. This will give you a chance to get away, come together and harness the healing power of the ocean and to do some major cleaning to your soul house!

• The 4 day cruise leaves from Los Angeles and stops at Catalina Island and Ensenada, Mexico.
• It departs LA on January 27th and returns back on January 31st.
• All Big Tough Girls need to be in Los Angeles BY January 26th. You will be meeting at a pre-assigned spot for dinner to enjoy an evening of getting to know everyone before you head to sea the next morning….let the vacay begin!
• The full cost is $600 and includes a shared hotel room on January 26th {in LA}, your cruise, all of your supplies for your soul work and the fabulous Big Tough Girl goodies.
• You are responsible for your travel and for your hotel if needed after we dock in LA on the 31st.

AAAAAND, I am giving away a FULL cruise pass. That’s right, we are celebrating Birth Mother’s Day by giving away A CRUISE! (Insert trumpets playing!)

To honor all you Big Tough Girls whom I call birth mothers (especially the three I love so dearly), there really is no better way than by giving one of you a much needed vacation with people who love and support you.

 

a Rafflecopter giveaway
Again, Happy Birth Mother’s Day to all those birth parents out there! You guys are some big tough girls. And you teach me every day.

 

P.S. Even if you don’t win the giveaway, I hope you will still consider the Big Tough Girl Cruise as something that could help you grow and learn and heal. More details on the cruise here.