Title: “help Him help you”
When my husband and I were going through years of infertility trials, we kept it a secret.
When we started looking into adoption, we kept it a secret.
When we went to our adoption classes and found out that we needed the help of our family and friends to make our adoption happen, we panicked.
You wouldn’t know it by reading my blog now, but back then, I was very reserved. We were going through a very isolating, heartbreaking and private trial. I didn’t want everyone “knowing my business.”
There was a time when I pictured us walking into church one day with a baby. And that was how I was going to tell our congregation we had adopted.
Finding out we had to tell people was frightening. It meant everyone would know everything. (At that point we had told our parents that we were looking into adoption, but got a prickly reception from a few of them. The thought of telling more people and risking that kind of reaction was something I was not looking forward to.)
No, no no. I was going to be the one who, after getting our profile up on itsaboutlove.org, would be quickly chosen by a birth mom. Itsaboutlove was how we were going to be found.
As with many things in my life, the Lord had a different plan for me than what I did. A better plan.
A few months after the adoption classes I was getting more adjusted to the idea of telling people. I had also started my adoption blog which helped me open up even more. One day I was reading blogs like therhouse and our local FSA blog and I saw posts about Pass Along Cards. I remembered in our classes how they mentioned them and that couples should look into getting some made. The example cards I saw on the blogs were really cute and fun. I thought “What the heck? I might as well.”
The problem was, I had no idea how to go about getting Pass Along Cards made.
My friend and neighbor, Jill, had just started up her own business. She was making our Christmas cards that year so I asked her if she could make me some Pass Along Cards. I told her what I wanted, she made some up and I loved them! I decided to throw caution to the wind and send them out in a mass-mailer along with a letter explaining our hope to adopt. (I also put the link to our adoption blog on our Christmas cards.)
It was another copy of our card.
That’s right, our birth mom got 2 copies of our pass along card from 2 separate people on the same day.
Do you believe in coincidences? I don’t.
During the time our birth mom was trying to find prospective couples, she never looked at the couples on itsaboutlove.org once.
The Lord knew that.
He knew that she wasn’t going to find us unless we put aside our fears and put forth effort and faith to help Him help us.
Our birth mom kept our 2 Pass Along Cards in the driver’s license window of her wallet for months. She was meeting with other couples at that time but she said she would look at our picture and think to herself “But I still have to meet Que and Brittany.” And the rest, as they say, is history. :)
|Our son’s birth mom, me, my mom, my friend, & her hair stylist. This was taken at a baby shower my friend threw for me and of course, I had to invite our birth mom and her roommate/stylist! –2009|
|Brittany, Que, Brie (birth mom) and baby Liam, 2009|